When is it right to have sex?
Everyone is different. People should pay attention to how they feel inside and what their body is telling them. A bit of nervousness is normal but if they are feeling scared, pressured or not aroused or turned on then it is likely not the right time yet.
How much sex is too much?
How often a person has sex is really an individual choice. It is perfectly okay to enjoy sex (including masturbation), whether it is a little or a lot. If someone has so much sex that it starts to consume his or her life and affect proper functioning, then that person should seek help. Sexual addiction is a very real problem for some people especially with easy access to pornography on the Internet. If you need help, Sex Addicts Anonymous
is a good place to start or check out the Canada Sex Addict Treatment and Therapy Services. Otherwise people should just listen to their bodies, which will help a person know their limits.
Is it wrong to cheat?
That is up to each individual, although a person could be very hurt (emotionally) if he or she found out a partner was cheating. Also, the more sexual partners a person has, the more potential risk there is for getting a sexually transmitted infection. When people cheat they put their partners at risk unknowingly and this is never okay. This question is really about values. In our society today “cheating” is not usually looked upon as an acceptable thing to do to someone.
Why does age matter if you are both ready for a relationship?
Technically, age only matters when consent is involved. The legal age of consent for sexual activity with someone of the same age or older is 16 years. People who are 14 and 15 years old may engage in consensual sexual activity with individuals who are no more than 5 years older than themselves. People 12 and 13 years old may not legally engage in consensual sex with someone who is more than 2 years older than them. People aged 11 or younger cannot legally consent to sexual activity. Consent means two people (or more) deciding to do the same thing at the same time, in the same way with each other. Any sexual act that is initiated upon someone without consent is illegal.
If you are going to have sex for the first time and you are scared, what should you do?
Very good question. People should pay attention to how they feel inside and what their bodies are telling them. A bit of nervousness is normal but if you are feeling scared, pressured or find you are not aroused or turned on then it is likely not the right time yet. Remember if a person is not feeling comfortable she or he has the right to stop sex at ANY time. Consent means two people (or more) deciding to do the same thing at the same time, in the same way with each other. Any sexual act that is initiated upon someone without consent is illegal.
There are many types and stlyes of sexual relationships – casual dating, long-term exclusive partnerships, marriage, polyamorous relationships where one or both partners have other partners. There are also sexual relationships that don't involve commitment, loving relationships, unloving ones, relationships where people cheat, abusive relationships, and many combinations of these.
Beliefs about sexuality and relationships vary from one person to another and can change over time. You get to decide for yourself what is “normal” and who you want to be involved with.
At its best, a sexual relationship makes you feel good about being yourself and adds quality to your life.
Sexuality is all about relationships…relationship to yourself, to a partner, to others and to society. The World Health Organization (WHO) defines sexuality as follows:
Sexuality is an integral part of the personality of everyone: man, woman and child. It is a basic need and an aspect of being human that cannot be separated from other aspects of human life. Sexuality is not synonymous with sexual intercourse, it is not about whether we have orgasms or not, and it is not the sum total of our erotic lives. These may be part of our sexuality, but equally they may not. Sexuality is so much more: it is in the energy that motivates us to find love, contact, feel warmth, and intimacy it is expressed in the way we feel, move, touch and are touched; it is about being sensual as well as sexual. Sexuality influences thoughts, feelings, actions and interactions and thereby our mental and physical health. (Langfeldt & Porter, 1986, p 5)
Sure – sexuality includes information about biology and the mechanics of sex but it is also about individuality and self-awareness, personal and cultural expression, communication with others, intimacy and love.
Read through this information to learn more about how to protect yourself from unwanted problems and enjoy sexuality as a positive and enriching part of your life.