The Truth about Sex

Finding the facts about the birds and bees can be difficult. Information from social media, movies, friends and what society thinks can confuse what is the truth and what is a myth. This guide tries to clear the confusion when it comes to sex and healthy sexuality.

 

Myth: Is a bigger penis better?

Truth: Penises come in all shapes and sizes. The idea that bigger is better is simply false. What really makes sex better is compatibility with your partner and open communication about what feels good and what doesn’t.

 

Myth: Vaginas are tight or loose depending on the amount of sex a person has had.

Truth: The “tight vs. loose” idea is fairly common, but it is purely false. The vagina is a muscle that expands and contracts. When a person is aroused, the walls of the vagina soften and lengthen, making insertion easier. If they are nervous, the walls of the vagina will naturally contract, making insertion difficult.

 

Myth: Sex is painful.

Truth: Sex should feel good –even if you are having sex for the first time or if you have had sex before . Feeling safe and comfortable is what’s important. If someone is nervous or tense, their muscles will contract, which may cause discomfort. If something does not feel good, tell your partner. You may need to slow down, use a lubricant or stop until you are feeling ready and comfortable.

 

Myth: Everyone is having sex.

Truth: It may seem like everyone is having more sex than you. The fact is everyone has different sex drives. Some people want to have sex a lot, while others are not interested in sex at all. What’s important is you are true to yourself and not worrying about what other people are doing.

 

Myth: You can’t get pregnant if….
a) you have your period
b) it’s your first time
c) you pull out
d) you are in certain positions
e) by rinsing with water after or using a douche

Truth: Pregnancy can occur when a sperm contacts and fertilizes an egg. While only one egg is released each month, ejaculation (and pre-ejaculate) carries about 200 million sperm. And it only takes one sperm to fertilize an egg. The best way to prevent pregnancy is by using a barrier (condom) and birth control.

 

Myth: Virginity only applies to vaginal sex. Other kinds of sex don’t count.

Truth: For centuries, the word “virginity” has been used to describe a heterosexual woman who has not had vaginal sex. This obviously does not represent people of all genders and sexual orientations – who likely have a different meaning of virginity. The ‘first time’ for everyone is subjective and personal – it means something different to each person. Everyone should be able to decide how important their virginity is and what it means to them.

 

Myth: Masturbation is harmful.

Truth: Masturbation is healthy and safe, as long as the person doing it feels good about it. Masturbation is very common and normal. Many people masturbate, but some people don’t. Everyone has a different interest in masturbation. There are appropriate times and places for masturbation, like in your bedroom with the door closed or wherever is private and safe.

 

Myth: You can get an STI from a toilet seat or from someone who looks dirty.

Truth: STIs are transmitted through body fluids such as vaginal fluids, anal/butt fluids, pre-ejaculate, ejaculate/semen and blood, or sometimes through skin to skin contact (i.e. herpes). The best way to prevent transmission is to get tested regularly (especially before having sex with a new partner) and use protection such as a condom.

 

Myth: Condoms take away the feeling and pleasure of sex.

Truth: Condoms come in different colours, shapes and sizes. Comfort and fit is important – you may need to try more than one brand to find what works for you. Other than abstinence, condoms are still the best way to prevent STIs and pregnancy. Let’s be honest, reducing risks is a turn-on.

 

Myth: Anal sex is only for gay men.

Truth: Wanting to try different sexual activities with your partner does not mean anything about your sexual orientation. Communicating with your partner about your desires is a great way to see what you’re into and what you’re not.

 

Myth: Pornography accurately portrays sex.

Truth: Pornography is a business that wants to make money. It is made up to show different versions of someone’s fantasy world with pretend characters. How people experience sex in the real world is very different. In real life, sex should be about intimacy, mutual respect, and clear and enthusiastic consent.

 

Myth: Sex is only good if you have an orgasm.

Truth: Sex should be pleasurable with or without an orgasm. The fact is some people never reach orgasm, while others might have multiple orgasms. Forget about the pressure to have an exciting finish and enjoy the whole experience.

 

Myth: Older adults don’t have sex.

Truth: Sex may look and feel different at every stage of life. Even if someone is older, they are still sexual beings and should continue to learn and explore their sexuality – no matter how many candles are on their birthday cake.

 

Myth: People with disabilities or chronic illness can’t have sex.

Truth: Many people have different levels of ability. Regardless of someone’s ability, they are still sexual beings and can enjoy consensual sexual relationships like everyone else.

 

Have we missed something? Is there a topic or question that you would like answered? Post your question n the “Have A Sexual Health Question?” section on the right side of the screen. Your question will be anonymous and our team of professionals will get back to you with an answer!